So, this is my blog…

Everywhere I look lately I see a bug. I am not a bug phobic or anything, but for some reason I keep finding them in places I really wish I hadn’t. For example on my baby’s blanket, on the rear view mirror of my car, on the paper towel roller, and in very high places of my ceiling. Because of these sightings I am sensitive to every itch and tingle I feel on my body. It reminds me of the story I heard recently about the little boy who complained of crackling in his ear only to later find he had two spiders in there, one living and one dead. My ears are crackling just writing about it. I cannot help but wonder what went through the spiders’ minds once they got into his ear. I am sure it looked like an intriguing adventure from the outside, but once inside it proved to be less than eventful. Not that I can blame them, I have made the same mistake with the bounce house at a four year old’s birthday party. The laughter and jumping is enticing, but after hopping in it becomes a motion sickness nightmare.

Anyway, I hope these bug sightings come to an end. Until they do, you better believe I will be paying close attention to any crackling in my ear.

This weekend was awesome. Here’s what happened:

Valentine’s Day was Thursday and because everyone and their mother is out celebrating love on that day, Chris and I decided to celebrate our love on the day after (Friday the 15th). February 14th just so happens to be the anniversary of our 1st date 9 years ago… crazy! To celebrate this Chris took me to a restaurant at the Montage Resort and Spa in Laguna. To be honest I think Chris was more excited about the meal than I was. Chris is kind of a foody and well I have always been a little simple when it comes to eating. Let’s just say Kraft was more than a household name for me growing up. I have always been a little intimidated by the complexity of fine food or that is at least how I felt before this meal.

The restaurant is named Studio and it is amazing. We were seated at a table over looking the water and every need and want was tended too. Despite the restaurants prestigious reputation, the wait staff was surprisingly down to earth. In most fancy restaurants I feel like I do not belong there or that I should be there with my parents. At this restaurant it felt like they had been eagerly anticipating my visit. Needless to say the service was amazing, but now on to the food. I could probably go on for a few more paragraphs just describing the food, but I will spare you my attempt to make your mouth water with my wordiness. Instead I will just say that my meal was like a gorgeous bouquet of flavors that melted the moment it touched my tongue. Not one ingredient was used too much or too little. For those of you who know me well and are familiar with my eating habits this meal was one of the few meals where I did not wish I was eating a bean and cheese burrito instead. To top the whole experience off, at the end of the meal we were invited back to the Kitchen to see where it all happens. This truly was a special meal and I am so thankful to have shared such and experience with my best friend, my husband. Here are some pictures taken with my phone.

The following morning we headed off to Pat and Beckey’s house to reconnect with our good friends Ryan and Samantha who were visiting from out of town. We have a great group of friends that we love very deeply so when we can all be together it is a real treat. We were missing of few, but for those of you reading this, you were missed. We were so happy to see Ryan and Sam and to hear all about where life has them and is taking them. It was also awesome to introduce them to our baby girl.

Sunday we spent time as a family at home which was great after a busy, but fun filled weekend.

I love weekends!!!

The truth is I am a closet Celine Dion fan. There it is, I cannot keep it in any longer. Feel free to laugh or judge, but there it is. I secretly own almost every one of her albums. When I am alone and bored you may find me putting on a lip sync concert to her for my baby as well. I do not know what it is about her, but I think she has an amazing voice. Even if you do not like her you would have to admit that it is amazing. It is so pure and strong.

I was reminded of how much I love her voice when I came across a television special tonight where she was performing for an audience of celebrities. I had to restrain myself from standing up and singing along at the risk of looking ridiculous in front of my husband. I am deeply regretting not attending her concert in Las Vegas. She was there for like 5 years. The truth is that secretly I wish I had the kind of voice that could move people in the same I am moved when I hear her sing.

Anyway, I thought I would just come clean about that. If you come across tickets, please take me

There is so much that I think about all day, but most of the time I think about what I wish I was doing or what I wish I was good at. I am starting to think that I spend all my time thinking about it instead of taking the time to actually “do” what I wish I was doing. For example, these are the things I want to do and be good at:

*Taking pictures ( I love photography and pictures, but I can’t seem to take a good picture)

* Organizing

*scrap-booking or at least keeping a photo journal of my family’s time together

* excercising

*praying

hopefully you see where I am going…

All these things are within arms reach, but I choose to dwell on not having them instead of working hard to obtain these goals. This would probably tie in nicely with my journey vs. destination blog. I do not want to take the time to learn how to be better at something, I just want to know how to do it. Basically what I am trying to say is that I spend too much time thinking about things I want to do that I end up talking myself out of doing them. Often times I get so tired from thinking so hard that I use the energy needed to actually do it.

I think I am going to take some time to think about what I am actually good at to encourage myself to add more to the list.

Thanks for listening

This weekend was a great weekend for me. It was a normal relaxing weekend. It has been a real adjustment having a baby and there was a time when I thought life would never feel normal again. The holidays were stressful having a newborn, and the cold and flu season hit our household with a vengeance, but now life seems to be settling down. I missed my husband deeply and this weekend was a great time of connecting with him and connecting with our baby girl.

Chris and I took CB to the park and we played with her and watched her smile at the world around her. We took pictures and shared great conversation. The weather was warm sunny with a cool breeze and it felt so good to be outside enjoying that. This weekend really got me excited about what my life could look like in the future. I am excited about having a family with Chris and for sharing these precious moments with him.

Thank you, Chris for this weekend and for a beautiful life ahead.

OK, so it has been a while. Sorry about that. I am easily distracted and totally undisciplined.

Anyway, since my last post I have been working aggressively on getting my 3 month old on a schedule to help her sleep through the night and I am proud to say that she does, sporadically. About 3-4 nights a week she will sleep in 8-10 hour stretches. I read several books and talked to a few of my friends and family who have all night sleepers and asked for their advice. The common theme to their advice was to let your baby cry it out. This may sound rigid and mean, but once you have determined that your baby is safe, fed, and changed you should let them cry it out and see if they will soothe themselves to sleep. Awesome, great plan. Sounds easy enough. WRONG!!!

There is something about a baby’s cry that can make you feel so inadequate. You can be playing with your baby, loving on them and talking to them and feeling so confident that you are doing everything right and then the second they start crying all that confidence goes out the window. In an instant you feel totally unequipped to handle the situation and you start asking yourself, “what did I do wrong?” I admit that every time I let CB cry, I feel like I am neglecting her needs and she is lying there thinking I am a bad parent. How awful! It is totally self focused for me to think that way, but that is a blog for another day. It’s hard. I can understand why some parents cannot do it. If you can stop the madness by holding, nursing, or rocking your baby, why not? Fortunately for C and I we do not have a baby that cries inconsolably for hours because maybe then I would have a different opinion about this.

As hard as it was, it worked. CB now sleeps through the night and wakes up very happy and content, which makes me happy and content